Just this morning in office lake i found this beautiful family of swans. two little cute babies were very hyper and their mom has to run behind them.
Archive for June, 2014
Responsibility, dependency, attached strings, whatever you call it, makes drastic impact on your decisions and plans. priorities are deciding factor in such cases. Dilemma arises when priorities clashes with one another. such life affecting decisions are hard to make, harder to face.
Being in a different country does affect you and your family. my case is completely different but when i heard his story, i felt that i myself end in the same situation in coming days. he was sent to Chicago in June 2012. everything was moving like a perfect movie. great job, higher salary, work form client location in US, growing carrier, happy parents, proud girlfriend who was soon to become a wife, it was like a dream.
Soon situation started turning around. family pressure started increasing by each passing month. every time he asked for leave, he was told ‘client’ is not agreeing. February 2013 he got two weeks holiday to go back, get married and travel back with not a single day exception. plan was to travel back with his wife, all preparation was done, visa was applied, girl left her medical carrier and for the sake of married life agreed to travel on dependent visa. when everything seemed to be fine visa got stuck in embassy. they were told some verification is required and it might take some time. with no other option, he traveled back alone. every time embassy gave the same answer. days started passing and then months. After June his parents started asking him to come back, they said people have started talking, they say you are having an affair or the marriage was against your will and what not. he decided to travel back and started asking for release from the project. every day was passing like a struggle, either explaining the situation to family or begging clients and managers for release from the project. it took three more month before they agreed to let him travel back to India. not even 15 days were passed his wife’s visa got cleared and within a month he traveled back to Chicago from a different project. things started coming back on track. next five months passed peacefully, but then his wife started asking to go back. whole day sitting at home was making her mad, her carrier has already taken a back seat. she was fed up of the loneliness, no one to talk, no one to share, just wasting and passing one day by other. Now he was completely clueless of what to be done. because of his visa, company will not let him stay in India and his wife and family wants him back in India.
After listening to him i thought, what is the point? you are neither here nor there. now when i am here and my marriage is getting planned, i wonder what will i do in such case? what option is left? just leave the job and find something in India? may be yes. for now we will cross the bridge when it arrives.
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Hell yeah !! marriages are made in heaven and God knows there is no such thing called heaven, if a God also exists. No, I am no atheist, Yes, i diverted from the topic.
First of all there is no comparison between a cell with a lock and a hall with open doors, as long as your crime partner is allowing you to walk free. its the same thing with marriages and live in relations, live in relations which end in a marriage is an ideal scenario. but again you are so much confident that after putting a lock, you will still be able to feel the same hall like freedom. spurious.
The hype, word ‘live in’ gets is limited. I stay here in Chicago and hardly find anyone even lifting his eyebrow on this. reason? non existence of society. they are not bound to society, its individual like i said in one of my earlier post ‘American culture, Indian culture‘. All hell doors get loose only in India (well, i am not sure of other countries, never been there).
each and every relation, needs an approval from society. things are changing in urban areas, but that is only till no one knows about it. I am still to hear a case where parents know about the live in relation of their child and are cool about it, No, none. our generation, for sure, is not the one who is going to reap the fruit.
On the contrary each and everyone of them want their child to get married. you dont even have a choice to remain unmarried as well and hell if it is a love marriage, holy cow, you are worst son your father ever got. arranged marriage, and as my friend here says, yes ‘the good boy theory‘ works perfectly. what a hypocritical society we live.
i can keep cursing, i can keep blabbering about it, forever, but when you ask which one is better, as long as the girl does not slap you with a charge of rape after your breakup, Live in relations are best way to be together till you both feel you can no longer live together.
There is nothing like a calm and peaceful time spent on the sands on a shore with cool breeze brushing through your body. Picture was taken on this weekend. 30 miles from Chicago downtown, Indiana Dunes national Lake shore.
Being an Indian staying in America, many a times i end up in a situation where i need to explain this. all wants to know what is the difference and are we better in any scenario? when i say no, simple debate is based on culture. look at them, they dont care of their parents, they get married so many times, they have kids without even marrying at all, some of them even dont get married and keep changing their partners. look at their cloths. look at their way of living. look look and look…
there was a dialog in movie ‘swades’ ‘jab hum muqabale me dabne lagte hain to hum apni sanskriti apni sabhyata ka naam lene lagte hain’ i find it really true. Indian culture is just a word of glory. i find it no way better than any other culture. we are still a bunch of followers. from childhood on wards we start shaping the mind of our children, follow this god, follow this religion, follow this guru, cow is our mother, beard is our symbol, turban is our pride, all such things are stuffed in our mind. there is no concept of natural selection. one when comes to an age where he can apply logic, he is already biased or say stubborn on the matter what is trained for.
the basic difference is, american culture is ‘Individual first’, they dont care about what other people think about them, they do what they like, what they love, what makes them happy. on the other hand Indian culture is ‘society first’ your likes and dislikes get last preference. first you think about your religion, then your cast, then your relatives, then your parents, then your children and then if there is any possibility you can think about yourself.
I have seen a father driving BMW and the son working in subway, can this ever happen in India? i would say never. why? it was beautifully explained to me by a friend who is now planning to settle down in america permanently. he said, its simple, once the boy starts earning, he is free, he has his own life and his own way of living. he is free to decide his religion, his partner, his good and his bad. unlike in India, he has no responsibility towards his parents as well, same applies for his parents. One man is solely answerable only to himself. Now when you look the same scenario in India, one man has responsibility of his parents, his partner, his children and also if its a join family, his siblings.
Now which one is better? Indian, because in old age someone will be their to support you, bullshit. millions of people in India are abandoned by their children and all with hatred in heart. Ultimately its all about doing what you like, making your own choices, living life the way you want and above all living free. So its not the culture makes us feel great or feel low, its about how free you are.
I will directly come to the point. ‘Love failure’ was the tag he used and sat beside me. i had already plenty of pending tasks in my hand. washing dishes, cooking and ironing my crumbled shirt. here i was sitting listening to some unsuccessful story of an unsuccessful romeo. ‘I loved her so much’ ‘I loved her like my saraswati’. Just to clear the air, saraswati is his cat’s name and yes, he loves the cat so much.
every time he used the word ‘Love’ i took a peak on the clock. time was racing and i was stuck with the word love. ‘her mother is a b***h’. Well see now it is getting ugly. he kept cussing the girl’s family. i am sure even saraswati would have objected to it.
“let me show you her picture’ holy shit. i thought of telling him that i was not at all interested in the story neither in the heroine of the story. its not good to hurt someone who is already in pain. and how much time would it take? he would show the picture and i will say ‘she is nice’ thats it. five minutes max.
‘Give me your laptop, she is there in my friend list’ sue you man. what the hell, dont you have a picture of hers in your phone? i was going to say this to him but till then my laptop was already in his lap.
After a rigorous seven minutes of search, he turned towards me ‘why i am not able to find her?’ how in gods name would i know? but you see i am a good boy for that matter and also this was a chance to get my laptop back. i took it and searched by typing her name letter by letter. no result.
‘dude, she have removed you from her friend list, its done by using the button called ‘unfriend’ i was sober enough not to smile on him. he kept looking at me. i bit my tongue to control my laugh. he stood up. i looked at the clock. i was late, but not doomed. as i closed the door behind him after saying ‘ i am sorry’ although i meant ‘thank you for leaving’, i ran towards the kitchen.
While putting the utensils in dishwasher, it struck me that may be he really loved her. maybe he should have checked himself before making her public or may be he just needs a book which says ‘how not to embarrass yourself?’
i was surfing through google site and found this nice phone. Motorola Moto G. for long i was thinking of buying a new phone as my old samsung phone was not ready to die and was still stuck with me for almost three long years now.
Its a high end budget phone. with everything you require in tour day to day life. not very good for gaming and not very bad either. for the price of $199 the phone seems to be worth.
it came with in three days. i opened it and was surprised to see the model. its handy and with a descent look. but thats not it. the box has only phone and a data cable. NO phone charger. so be aware of the fact the charger might be cut from the package to manage the cost. So if you do not have charger, you have to buy it separately.
Over all it was a fair enough deal. and as i already have my samsung charger, i am not worried of it. i will add more once i start using it. for now i am searching for a sim card cutter.
Ghost ellipsis ... 